There are just sometimes that I freaks out and just gets so excited without a reason, at first , I considered it my strength because that is just one way for me to be happy.
Everyone of us, exists with the reason of becoming happy and merry. Simple thing as it may sound, but it is definitely not, happiness seems to be the most difficult thing we can ever achieve because even in our silence we can’t really figure out what we want.
When we are younger, we study hard to get a good job after graduating in college and if we finally land a job, we will do all our best just to earn more. See, everything people does is just for money, but are these thing people does for themselves satisfies and makes them happy?
However life is not just about eating foods, you must have to live and love life. Living life is not just to live with it like a daily routine, instead, living life is doing all the things you wanted to do.
In my case,I always ask God if what does he wants me to do. Does he wanted me to serve his people?, yes its fine with and I will do it with open arms, but still, along the way, while I’m on my way traveling the road unfold, I realize that I have a lot of things to fix first before doing the things that I love to do the most, and then I came into the point that I don’t know if all the things I believe of what I’m supposed to be is true or am I just pretending.
I am not able of identifying the reality from what is not, and the thought of it makes me get high. I know that I shouldn’t feel this way, but whenever I’m in this situation that I don’t know how to handle, I just get high without literally taking any drugs. I get mad to another people though, I get irritated to small thing and big things much faster and even in my self, but when I’m all by my self, I get just so high and happy. What does this mean?
I am outspoken but I can hardly speak my mind, I wanted to do something but I can’t even move my body into the direction, I wanted to shout, I wanted to scream but who would hear, or does anybody care? Does anybody even care about me? The soonest you can accept the reality, the soonest you can move on, and I already accept the fact I can only rely to myself, myself myself.
And I don’t care about any other things but me….Im gonna live my live without putting people who doesn’t even sees or hears me into consideration. There could only be one person who can honestly love me but ME and no other. This is gonna be forever I wont let other people get in to my life.